Jane is a charming miniature version of her mother. Her hair
is beautifully done the ‘obama’ style. Her face is properly adorned with makeup,
eyelashes; lip bum etc. she is spotting a white sleeveless top and a black
pencil trouser. She is in high heel shoes making her look taller than her
peers. Her combination of natural childhood grace and
grooming effects make her look way much mature for her seven years of age.
Looking at her one would get the impression that it is all rosy on her until
yesterday I experienced something that made me wonder why the society is
holding kids to the same rigorous and almost untenable standards they hold
themselves. Meet the modern child who spots piercings from the conventional to
the most unconventional places like tongue, nose and even chest!
She isn’t playing with her friends and she cut the figure of
a forlorn child. I can see from her eyes that she really wants a piece of the
hide and seek her friends are playing today but something is really holding her
back. Out of curiosity I walk to her and ask her why she is not playing and her
answer does not surprise me strangely. Slowly she whispers into my ears ,”mummy
atanichapa nikichafuka”.it is not difficult to get her mother’s logic but what
is even more perplexing is why we as a society cannot just let kids be.
But that is not the only bit she has to deal with daily.
Recently I went to a beauty parlor to get my hair done and accidentally bumped
into her and her mother. She was at the verge of tears and winced in pain under
the heat of the hair dryer. Her mother in mock anger was reprimanding her for
being so weak while at the same time letting her genuine concern show. And even
her best efforts to impress her mother and gain the lollipop she was promised
could not help her from the occasional twitching of the face or even a muffled yell.
After what seems like almost an eternity to her she heaves a sigh of relief and
were I a face reader I could swear that her face said something, her excitement
was exuberant and very visible. She couldn’t hide her disappointment when her
mother spots a part not done to her standard and wants it redone. But this time
it’s done quickly and the little angel can now go. The reprieve though is short
lived as the beautician tells me that in two weeks time they will be back
again.
This got me thinking about what our society has become,
materialistic, very superficial and concerned more about the facial representation
of facts as compared to the inner and deeper moral values our fathers believed in.
Lest I be accused of being conservative let me clarify that I don’t subscribe
either to the belief that children should be half dressed leaving their dry
buttocks to the whims of the weather. Neither do I believe that they should not
be smart and clean. My concern here is the methodology of arriving at the conclusions;
the means justifying the end. Whilst it’s true that most parents are driven by
the sacred love and the sharpest of maternal instincts, others on the other
hand view their children as rods to achieving their ends. Mothers who dreamt of
representing their beloved nations in beauty pageants in Rio or Johannesburg
live their dreams through their children.
As much as I believe that beautiful and well groomed kids
are a blessing and the pride of their parents, moderation should be looked into
to ensure that no one gets the wrong deal. Piercings and other extrovert
emblems of beauty I believe should be out of free will and voluntary consent which
of course the children aren’t capable of. What if on growing up the child
realizes that she doesn’t what the piercings anymore? Beauty is not merely the
outward representation of glamour and correct facial construction or even the
absence thereof it; it is what the person has inside, his or her attitude towards
people and the demeanor or the lack of it towards members of the human race
considered their inferior. That if instilled in children at tender ages can be
what best we bequeath to them as parents as compared to the cut throat competition
for misguided beliefs and scoring in the wrong post.
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